一首想谢谢我妈咪的歌~~

妈妈

那年还没长大

常常让你牵挂

是我不好你担心了吧

懵懂很不听话

也曾顶嘴吵架

我的脾气你没办法

你一个人沉默撑着家

任岁月在你额头刻划

你说爱是唯一的解答

那皱纹是代价

斑白的发是惩罚

妈妈辛苦为家

你别再让泪流下

我会照顾这个家

亲爱的妈妈休息你辛苦了

没想过天会塌

总要你等一下

有谁多晚都等我回家

伤了你的气话

无意说的谎话

你都微笑说算了吧

我知道你累

现在换我来背

我一定不让你后悔

我让未来很美

亲爱的妈妈

请别再流下眼泪

你真是辛苦了妈妈

妈妈你不用哭了

妈妈妈妈

不要再哭了

当听到《妈妈》这首歌就像放上网。。这个很有意思。。它让我想起了很多事情，2009年十一月了。。新的一年又要来了。。现在又听着这首歌，真的觉得岁月不饶人，太快了。。芭比妈咪老了。。我也长大了，十八岁了。。现在的我，都过得还好。。

这阵子发生了好多事，前一天才跟朋友说笑，隔一天却听到死讯，说真的，震叹比伤心多一点。。现在才惊觉我们不能预知下一秒发生什么事情。。只能学会去珍惜每一分每一秒。。之前浪费了太多时间。。现在后悔了。。但现在不能只有后悔，还要抱握每一秒，把全部的事情给补回来。。。

伤心开心事情可以说是每天都能见到。。但还是得告诉自己，平常心。。佛家说：“看破放下专念佛，真诚清静平等觉”。。虽然不是真的明白当中的意思，但还是对此句有感觉。。知道该怎样做。。现在的我，只想尽快找到自己说想要的，为此而努力。。没尝试过怎知道是自己想要的吗，所以加油！！告诉自己，父母是我的动力，我也是父母的动力！！我要让父母感到骄傲！！加油！！梦想是要由我去实践！！

追随着梦想的我~~

我的梦想。。

我的理想。。

它是遥远的。。

是遥不可及的。。

就因为梦想遥不可及~~

有时让我想放弃~~

让我琢磨不定。。

每一天。。

每一时。。

看完了心中的榜样的节目。。

在我心里栽种了。。

想要学习他们认真努力的态度。。

是他们让我看清楚有时不需要天分。。

但需要十足的信心。。

勇气。。即对自己的渴求。。

再加百分的努力和认真。。

就能成功。。

威廉。。

你的节奏和舞步可能跟不上其他人。。

但你努力了。。

也更是在香港红勘写下了完美的章节。。

是你感动了我~~

是你让我相信有努力。。

就会有成果。。

现在的我需要更努力~~

我要精进自己的才艺。。

我要让我的才艺让我父母骄傲。。。

海豚妹。。

加油！！

棒棒堂~我心中的榜样！！

2009年8月28号~~

倒数的3天~~

预祝马来西亚生日快乐噢~~

假期即将过完~~

妹妹我要回宿舍了~~

好舍不得噢~~

今天好开心~~

妹妹滴偶像犬犬

终于又有新文章在无名了~~

呵呵~~

棒棒堂得加加油噢！！

小妹这儿支持你~~

很多朋友都说我没眼光

为什么喜欢靠外表的团体~~

但在这里想对不喜欢棒棒堂的人说~~

棒棒堂是真的有真材实料。。。

他们可能需要一点时间才能像王力宏。。

周杰伦甚至是东方神起一样。。

可是我看到他们的努力~~

他们的团结~~

相信他们一定会很成功的！！

棒棒堂~！！我们这些棒迷一定会支持你的！！

加油加油再加油！！

棒棒堂是我的偶像。。

是我努力的目标~~

他们认真对待每一件事情。。

每个步骤~~

他们带我更接近我的梦想！！

你们不能半途而废！！

敖犬。。王子。。阿伟。。

威廉。。小煜。。小杰。。

你们是我心中永远的棒棒堂~~

任何一个都不能少！！

加油！！

加油~~祝我好运！！

8月6号。。再过五分钟。。就是明天了。。

写着部落格的我。。迎接明天的到来。。

不好意思地说~~其实我刚做完数学练习~~

我的脑子还是晕晕的~~

许多数学的方程式还在脑子回荡~~

然而~~这使的我。。

已经精疲力尽。。

现在的我。。后悔了~~

后悔当初的不努力~~

朋友们一个个应该是在睡觉了吧~~

而我独自的在写部落格~~

没办法~~

写部落能让我松懈紧张的情绪~~

明天我将接受艰难的考验~~

希望明天的考验不会太难~~

上天保佑~~

以前的我觉得简单就是最好的。。

所以放弃了许多学习的机会~~

导致现在基础不好~~

然而现在的我~~

真的后悔了。。

我害怕。。很害怕。。

心理的恐惧檫不掉。。

觉得好压力~~但没办法~~

始终要面对的！！

唯一庆幸的是~~

宝贝陪我~~

给我信心替我加油~~

我爱你宝贝~~

还有爸爸妈妈~~

他们三个是我的动力~~

我好想他们~~好久没回家了~~

爸爸身体还好吧？？

妈妈呢？好想念妈妈的布丁~~

时间倒是过得挺快的~~

快要考试了~~

压力一天比一天的大~~

可是我真的想对芭比妈咪说~~

我真的尽力了~~

对不起~~如果成绩让你们很失望~~

以前的我没努力~~总觉得学一学就会了。。

然而现在的我后悔了~~

晚上12点18分~~

累了~~是该睡了~~

晚安~~今天是美好的一天~~

祝我好运~~

对不起。。芭比妈咪和我家宝贝。。

我回来了！！阔别很久的部落格~~对不起。。

我从此不会再轻易放弃你了！！

没写部落格的时间有两个月了~~

这两个月发生了好多无法想象的事。。

高兴悲伤统统都有~~

刚看了John的部落格。。

发现他真的很爱敏~~

敏。。你很幸福！！

我呢？？也很幸福！！

爱情有时候好特别~~

它有时让你高兴有时让你忧。。

时间过得很快~~

我和宝贝过完了97天。。

3个月的魔咒真的不存在了对吧？？

我们很恩爱。。

但晙旷童鞋说的没错~~

每段恩爱的感情后一定有不愉快的过去~~

这些日子~~我们两友吵架。。

闹分手~~悲伤~~

昨天也哭了一个早上。。

然而。。我们都很在乎对方~~

所以没放弃彼此。。

想对宝贝说：

宝贝没自信我想替宝贝加油！！

我心情不好有宝贝陪伴~~

有了爱情的我~~就如有了方向。。

谢谢宝贝你。。

给了我许许多多我无法为你做的事。。

然而对不起。。因为我给你添麻烦了~~

有了感情。。我的亲情。。

就不是如此的美好~~

前天芭比的一通电话。。

让我流泪。。让我感动~~

我知道他们是爱我的。。

尽管我做错了事~~

是我不争气。。是我失败~~

芭比妈咪应该知道了。。

其实这些并不是我想要读的。。

所以希望我回来做我想做的事~~

最后芭比开口了~~

回来帮芭比。。帮堂姐。。

但芭比~~对不起~~

我想完成现在的学业~~

完成这课程。。

即使这不是我想要的课程。。

再考虑是不是应该走下去~~

我不想让别人瞧不起芭比。。

但对不起。。你有无能的女儿。。

失败的女儿。。

总无法达到你想要的。。

对不起芭比妈咪。。

妈咪。。以前我好恨的人。。

但最后却是让我敬佩和敬爱的人。。

可是我也好难过。。

没法达到你的要求~~

你和芭比总是为我着想。。

为我铺好路。。

但我总让你们失望。。

有时我真想来个背包旅行。。

背一背旅包。。

就这样踏片这个世界。。

但这个像是逃避了现实。。

逃避了我不想走的路。。

我的梦想是当个演员。。

然而我知道在你们眼里。。

他是不实际的。。是个空壳~~

但那个才是我真正想要的。。

我不知道几年后。。

这还是不是我的梦想。。

但现在我想做的只有那~~

对不起~~再三的对不起。。

割破了你们的希望。。

现在是半夜12点多~~

是个很静的夜晚。。

然而我无法入睡~~

还有一个星期~~

我就进了生死关~~

我讨厌考试~~

但是我一定要面对~~

现在的我无法给与芭比妈咪任何希望~~

只能说我尽力了。。

我没读书天分~~

对不起~~一直让你们失望~~

♥Unforgetable Experience!!♥

Its Saturday, 30 May 2009.I took part in my cousin's event~Orbing..You all know what is orbing??Dunnoe nvm..I will show u!!It's a game which can put 2 ppl inside a ball!!Its cool man!!I didnt lie u!!Haha..You sure will like it!!

The most unforgetable is the fear factor~~And the commitee is my best frenz in college,Mayen~~Gosh,the most scary part i have never been~~Oh my god!!Its caterpillars at the box and we nid to use mouth to bites out the sweets!!Wtf!!Its suck!!When i tried bite the sweet out~~My evil commitee frenz & my evil cousin tried to scared me!!Good lor!!Tears nearly came out!!It was too scary...But at last i sucessfully to took out the sweet!!My two 'good' frenz and cousin!!U all watch out!!@,@...

Next will be the orbing game~~Haha~~Its too cool!!I damn love it~~Tis game can use two ways to play~~One is dry(That means without water) and another is washing machine(Is adding water into the ball and its action like washing machine)..Me and Mayen chose the washing machine~~We very anxious and a bit scare too~~Haha~~After we climbed into the ball~~done the last preparation~~commitee pushed down the ball~~Gosh!!Ah~~Ah~~We scream like hell!!Its too exciting and my leg keep kicking Mayen~~Mayen keep called me dun kicked her but then i dunnoe Y i cant hear juz keeping kicked and kicked..Hoping the ball stop!!Finally the ball stopped~Hooz~~We wet..And Tze Hwee took photo for us~~Wahaha~~the feeling damn good!!

There also some games let me enjoyable~~such as achery,giving 'blind' ppl intructions to pick the woods and fixed it become a model,and a game which very arritating ppl - use strings to move the ball from begginer to final then beginner again..Abt 6..We taking bus back~~Everyone slept in the bus because its very tiring...

♥Flower Four♥

8th June 2009(Monday)

Today morning woke up at 9.15~~I sms my bibies then juz went for a quick bath~~

Its 9.50!!Got to rush to class~~Today Moral test!!Its one hour test~~Ehm..question quite ok~~Its common sense~~Altot yesterday didnt study~~And even see the Jurrasic Park 3 with frenz!!Wahaha~~~After finish exam..me and my frenz go to cafeteria eating~~When passby the adventure counter..Unluckily let zhi hwei saw me~he ask me join the Gunung Ledang trip~Its in this Saturday..Ehm..Got to go back~~Then maybe juz forget it bar~~And hor..Very tough de lor~~Got to climb leh~~Lazy geh!!Haha~~

After we finish eating..we came to library~~Xinyee open the Baidu and search the Hua Yang Nan Zi picture~~And i went for online to see my CMA pic comments~~When Yee opened a photo which i like very much~~I nearly screaming~~Its Yi Zhen in Hua Yang~~He damn handsome!!I love it very much~~Muacks~~

Its let me remembered that when i saw their movie~~The screen keep come out for non-stop~~So hope can see again~~Woo~~We keep copying Hua Yang actor's photo~~Too handsome liao they all~~Wahaha~~Muacks..Muacks~~

It's 1.30~~Got class in 2 till 6~~Hiaz..Sienz + Tired...

College Models Angels!!

6/6/09(Saturday)

It's Special Saturday because it is College Models Angel audition!!It's great!!I had taking part in~~Altot i know i will not in~~But at list i tried it!!Now my confident had been increase much!!Haha~~

Yesterday i was still suffering that wether am i going for this audition because my frenz had to rush back to Malacca and cant taking part~~So i juz phone my parent ask for their opinion~Suprisingly my father said:"Go,dear!!Go for it!!Don't scare and dont care ur frenz~~Juz do it!!I sponsor all!!"Haha~~That let me wondering maybe i should go for it~~Dont let my parent dissapointed!!So at that nite,I going for photo session~~Ehm~~How to say?I didnt make up at first de~~And juz simple dress it!!But when i am there~~Hooz!!U can see many gals wearing dress,make up~~Lol..A bit lost confident already!!But i saw my frenz and going to taking photo too~~They keep calling me go and they make up for me~~So at last i finished my photo shooting too~~

The next morning which is today~~I still thinking that go or not go!!Haha~~U cannot blame me!!300 participants got to choose 30 models!!Its impossible me to in..ok??But at last i still going~~I keep telling myself!!Juz for fun~~Get more experience!!When i got there,my frenz said" finally u come!!"Haha~~a bit shy..Bcoz i am late!!I went register and then go and measure my body!!Wahaha~~I got a bit lose weight lor!!I lost abt 2kg something~~After measuring i went to taking my full body photo!!Ehm~~Still very fat for me leh~~Sad!!My no. is A048!!(See wether this no. can give me luck or not!!)Haha~

While waiting for our turn..I tried to lend my frenz's mirror for doing the last preparation!!One guy is coming for a little briefing~He talking proffesionally~~Let me getting more anxious~~Woo~~We waiting for few hours~~When its our turn,a indian helper bring us go to one room~~And its audition room..I getting more and more anxious!!Gosh~~The music rocks man!!I saw one and one model keeping go out~~some of them look great..some of them keep walking and drinking~~Well..they anxious as me too..

Me..Precious..Chia Sing and Ding Ding go to toilet took a deep breath while we heard oine of the organizer briefing..We got to catwalk,posing~~And would be ask for talent too!!We even practice at toilet~~Wahaha~~Waiting for half and hour,its Precious go in."Good luck..Precious,"we said~~After that is Ding Ding then Chia Sin~~And its my turn!!God bless me!!God bless me!!After a deep breath,i walking in confidently~~I tried to feedback what the pose which i learn from Internet!!After cat walking,they request me for standing in front a bit!!They asking me some simple question~~They ask me to do some poses also!!Well~~I feeling that its look not so nice(Juz feeling coz i didnt see the photo)..They ask me to cat walking again~~Then its finish..I walking back wif confidently too~~But when i go out..Hooz~~~~

We been requested to taking another photo session too~~That is for 2 minutes photo session..We nid to thinking different poses and the camera is non stop shooting!!Gosh~~Its a difficult task to me!!Waiting for few minutes~~Its my turn again for photo shooting~~When i get in there..Its not too anxious for me this time~~In this photo shooting i using chair to taking~~Ehm..Feeling still ok~~Juz hope the picture is good looking too!!''Last shot!!,''the photographer said.I tried to do my best and nicest look through this last shot!!''Well done,its look great!!,''he said.Hooz~~Hope really is nice!!I waiting for the CD for twenty minutes..and Chia Sing bring us go to secret recipe!!I damn hungry man!!Juz realize i didnt eat for lunch and breakfast~~Wahaha~~

While waiting..I using my laptop to view the CD which i juz got it..Anxious~~Anxious!!How do i look like!!Nice??Weird??Or Fat??My brain keep come out question for non stop~~Well..Its still oklar..Hehe..Alright~~Thats all for today..Its too tired for me~~Today sleep early bar!!God bless me!!